Thursday, January 1, 2009

Holiday "Hmmm"s

Was your holiday fun? Ours has been busy yet quiet. Not much planned but so busy with preparations for what little we did do. I'm looking forward to Little Bit going back to school next week, and yet I have loved having her here. She has touched my heart in some very special ways. At bedtime she gets cups of water for The HOFFER and me to keep on our bedside tables overnight. One night she pre-made some bottles for Baby Bit and put them in the refrigerator before heading to bed. One of the Christmas gifts she made for each of us was a "Gift of Words". She wrote out an anagram of our names plus Mommy and Daddy, and the words she came up with for us were so very sweet. Here's what she wrote for us:

D ude
A ctive
D addy-tastic
D addy-fun
Y ou rock!!!

M ommy-tastic
O ptimistic
M ore better than any mommy
M ore helping than anybody
Y ou are nice

I love the "D is for DUDE" on!!! Oh my daughter is the sweetest. I am so blessed.

I am craving some normalcy and routine. My brain just isn't up to the activity of the holidays this year. Perhaps a "new baby" thing, but I really feel like I've blown it to a certain extent this year. I know I'm still adjusting to Baby Bit and figuring out the "new mommy" thing again, but I still think I should've been able to make the holiday time more special than it was. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself, maybe not...I don't know. But the holiday is about over, so I can only go forward from here and try to do better next year. This time of year is one of Little Bit's favorites, so I hate that we didn't do more festive things. Thankfully, she doesn't seem very disappointed in her break, I don't think. At least I did my Christmas letter with pictures this year...although I have yet to send it out. Well, it's more than I did last year.

So what do I wish I had done this Christmas?

1. Get my Christmas shopping started and done much earlier, like July
2. Bake cookies and other goodies to give to neighbors and friends
3. Not leave teacher and classmate gifts for last-minute
4. Get Christmas cards/letters with pictures out by first half of December
5. Decorate house, inside and out (we did get the tree done!)
6. Make hot chocolate (the recipe on the Hershey's cocoa box is THE BEST!!!)
7. Check out Christmas lights more often (Little Bit loves doing this, especially in her pj's)
8. Set out cookies for Santa (even though we've had the Santa talk, we decided to go ahead and set cookies out for him anyway, just because it's fun.)
9. Had breakfast, lunch and dinner already prepared and ready to go into the oven so I wouldn't end up cooking and cleaning the kitchen for the majority of the day
10. Watched more Christmas specials with my family

However, since I'm so optimistic (Little Bit used this one because she couldn't think of a word that started with O!!!), I'm going to be glad for the things I did do:

1. Printed out Christmas newsletter with pictures of both girls to send out
2. Decorated tree
3. Made cookies for Little Bit's classmates and teacher, plus had extras to give out (a total fluke but still warrants bonus points!)
4. Made it to Little Bit's class Christmas party and took pictures
5. Drove around neighborhood looking at Christmas lights at least two, maybe three times
6. Drove through "Santa's Ranch" light display (required a 30-minute drive south of town and a 40-ish minute wait in line just to get in, plus $20 entry...ouch)
7. Didn't arrive empty-handed to brother's Christmas shin-dig...took cookies
8. Had my traditional gift-wrapping time while watching the traditional 24 hours of "A Christmas Story" on TBS
9. Watched "A Charlie Brown Christmas" about six times and "The Grinch" about four times with Little Bit
10. Had a sweet baby added to my Christmas celebration
11. Read through "What God Wants for Christmas" with my family

At least I had more positives than negatives. That's not such a bad thing. And again, maybe I'm being too hard on myself. But there are women out there who can do all this stuff and more in addition to having a baby...I'm just not one of them. It seems I can't get my act together since bringing Baby Bit home. I've never been very "together" in the first place, and having a baby seems to have brought my worst incompetence to the forefront. My consolation is that I know what I need to work on and what to plan for next Christmas. And while I'm not one to make New Year's resolutions, I do love having a fresh start, a clean slate, or a second chance. And that, for me, is the beauty of the new year.